When winter has passed....

It's Spring in New Zealand.  The winter has passed and new life is popping up all around.  There have been lots of rainy, gloomy days but brilliant, sunny ones as well.  Like the morning currently shining through my window.

Even the wilderness and desert will be glad in those days.

The wasteland will rejoice and blossom with spring crocuses.

Yes, there will be an abundance of flowers and of singing and joy!

The deserts will become as green as the mountains of Lebanon, 

as lovely as Mount Carmel of the plain of Sharon.

There the Lord will display his glory, 

the splendor of our G0d.

With this news, strengthen those who have tired hands,

and encourage those who have weak knees.

Say to those with fearful hearts,

"Be strong, and do not fear, 

for your G0d is coming to destroy your enemies.

He is coming to save you."

And when he comes, he will open the eyes of the blind 

and unplug the ears of the deaf.

The lame will leap like a deer, 

and those who cannot speak will sing for joy!

Springs will gush forth in the wilderness, 

and streams in the wasteland.

The parched ground will become a pool,

and springs of water will satisfy the thirsty land.

Marsh grass and reeds and rushes will flourish 

where desert jackals once lived.     

And a great road will go through that once deserted land.

It will be named the Highway of Holiness.

-Is. 35:1-8

I LOVE the mental picture that brings!  Beauty out of barren land.  Healing out of a wasteland.  HOPE.....

Last night I heard Casting Crown's new rendition of one of their much loved songs.  And it reminded me that this..........

.......doesn't happen without the rain.  And the storm.  

Just like in the garden of my (and your!) soul.

Days like today make me smile. But they're all the more brilliant because of the winter and the barren days that have passed.  Yet today the birds are singing!!!

Now listen to this!  

Responsibility and Hope

Steve's still where we usually live and has been really enjoying the time.  He's hosted a couple of great teams as well.  The current one from one of our supporting fellowships in the US sent skilled tradesmen who have been giving large portions of FS a face lift with a coat of paint.  Because they can work extra quickly they're painting walls in high traffic areas that have never been painted before.

Five new women have recently started training as well!

I heard a wonderful story the other day about how a large retail store in the city donated very slightly damaged but new cots/cribs to the nursery/creche.  That's really a first since the general feeling in the city is to avoid contact with people in our area.  The store wanted photos to show their employees so one of the women who has in the past few years taken a position of leadership in the office took the photos to the most flash mall in town so they could see.  This is a place that it's surreal to walk into because of the contrast between what's inside and what's in the city around it.  It made me smile to hear how excited this woman was when she came back at how welcoming the staff was and how pleased they were to see the photos.  This is a women who before she started work at FS wouldn't have been welcome to even walk through the doors of the mall........

Change!!!  And now she can hold her head up high.

On the flip side Steve says there are more women 'standing in line' on the main road nearby than he's ever seen before.

I've been thinking lately about how in ways life at FS has 'ruined' us----because now there's a lot that we know.  I worked before Hannah was born at a jewelry store for a number of years and to this day still notice jewelry without meaning to.  After time at FS I notice women that I wouldn't have before.  I know who is looking for a 'customer' on the streets even though she's not scantily dressed and there's not a brothel nearby.

That translates to the streets of New Zealand where I am at the moment.  I find myself googling the awareness of trafficking here and asking questions about the welfare of women.

William Wilberforce, who was instrumental in abolishing slavery in England said:

“You may choose to look the other way but you can never say again that you did not know.” 

Now I know.  And with that comes responsibility.

That's pretty daunting at times......

I don't like seeing more darkness than I used to be aware of.  There's a lot of shadow in this world.  And I don't like wrestling with those 'why' questions that arise.

That's why I love verses like this:

"On this mountain he will destroy the shroud that enfolds all peoples, the sheet that covers all nations; he will swallow up death forever. The Sovereign L0RD will wipe away the tears from all faces...."    Is. 25:7-8

It's not forever.

We all sing things like, "Break my heart for what breaks yours.  Everything I am for your Kingdom's cause."  And we mean it.  But that doesn't mean that it's easy to always walk it out.

I love being part of FS because while there's darkness all around it's a place of hope as well!

(Someone else's blog I read today that meant a lot to me:  Why I will not say I never made a sacrifice )

Happenings....

It's been a while since I've given just a general update so thought I'd post a few things that are going on.  First of all, as of yesterday we now have two high school graduates in the family. Yay! Congratulations, Rachel!  And Hannah has finished her first year at Univ. and is very much enjoying herself learning and working hard at her internship.  I've gotten to hear her speak several times lately.  She does a great job---and that's not just because I'm biased!

Adam turns 10 on Monday and there will be no single digit kids left in the family.....

Steve has been back working where we usually live for the past several weeks.  He's loving it!  He will come back to NZ in three more weeks and bring Aaron for Christmas as well.  For various reasons, one being taking the time for me to get back to full health before I go back to the Third World, I will stay in NZ for the next year.  I have to be here for the second half to complete the time for residency anyway, and we think it unwise that I go back at the end of January yet as was the original plan.  Steve will go back for around three months at the end of Jan., however.

In light of that we've also decided that Aaron will stay in NZ with us for the coming year as well.  He's had a rough last term at boarding school and is excited that he'll get to be with us this year!

Aaron and one of his favorite teachers

Marked

Steve and I were able to do a debrief for people in our line of work last week.  (He flew back to the city we work in yesterday.)  It was an excellent time of evaluating and processing our personal histories.  It also gave especially me some great perspective on what I need to do differently in the future.  How Steve and I naturally see some things differently so how better to support each other as well.

One thing that may sound a bit too simple for me to need to be reminded of (but was necessary!), was the understanding that it is OK to have needs of my own.  I was designed that way!  Compassion Fatigue is apparently common with people who work with people with dire needs.  Their needs seem so overwhelming that you discount your own, but then fade over time yourself.

One thing that really struck me as we went through this time of evaluation was this.  Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could become totally 'whole' in all areas.  Wouldn't it be great if we could like the three men in the fiery furnace come out the other side of things, "without even the smell of fire," on us?  (Dan. 3:27)

Unscathed sounds great but then maybe we'd be without some of the benefits of those experiences as well?  Maybe we wouldn't have increased wisdom, compassion for people in similar circumstances, and most of all we'd lack His 'mark' on us in ways that matter.  After wrestling for a night with G0d Jacob always walked with a limp. (Gen. 32: 24-26) It was his Father's mark on him for the rest of his time on Earth.  A reminder.

Like Paul did we should boast in our weaknesses. (2 Cor. 12:9) They're the sign of His power working through us, not our own.  They're areas that He's touched us.  And while they may make us feel 'weak' in ways they're just a sign that HE is strong.

Seeker

I'm turning into a seeker of the sun.  Most of my adult life has been in countries where you tend to avoid the sun so you don't melt!  That's true where we usually are, too, but there the smog is so dense that while it makes you hot, the sunshine never gives that nice 'ahhh' feeling on the skin.

New Zealand is cool enough this time of the year that I'm finding myself irresistibly drawn to sunbeams.  I'm outside as much as possible to look at beautiful things and feel that sun on my skin.  It just feels soooo good. (Maybe I'm low on Vitamin D!)

But seeking the creation is only a shadow of seeking the Creator.  The sun on my skin reminds me that I need to be a seeker of the Son, too........

"For ever since the world was created, people have seen the earth and sky.  Through everything G0d made, they can clearly see his invisible qualities--his eternal power and divine nature. So they have no excuse for not knowing G0d"          -Rom 1:20

In front of our house.

View from 'my' bench by the beach.

Pathway beside the beach

Another....

Tree on the beach

Just because they're so cute!

Photos are just taken with my phone so not the best quality!  I need to remember to take a real camera with me sometimes.

Being Creative

I am about the least artistic person that I know when it comes to drawing or anything along that line, so when I walked into a creative journaling seminar last week and saw art supplies on the tables I got a bit nervous!  I guess the fact that the seminar was called "Beyond Words: Journal Workshop" should have clued me in!  Luckily the seminar gave opportunity for creative expression, but didn't require any skill to participate.

It was really good to be challenged to think outside of the box. As someone who likes words I tend to just journal by writing a lot.  The downside is that if I'm not in a mindset to articulate well, then I don't journal and leave huge gaps in my 'story.'

I didn't write the figures down so don't quote me, but the speaker talked about how bringing a creative aspect into something that you do actually slows down the words per minute that your brain processes (something like 600 words per minute as the usual down to 120) and leaves you in a more restful, contemplative mode.  And how much we need that in our modern world.  And how helpful that is to calm us down to contemplate Scripture and talk to our Father.

We did a number of exercises which I actually quite enjoyed---even though there was something art related in my hand!  One of them was to write a 'cinquain' and decorate it if you wished to slow yourself down to really think.  I think I related especially well to this one because it still let me use words!  A cinquain is this:

Start with ONE word
Choose TWO adjectives
Add THREE words ending in 'ing'
Next come FOUR words that make a sentence
Lastly,  a ONE word ending.

A few days ago something happened that suddenly left me feeling tense, unfocused, and worried.  I decided to try a cinquain in my journal at home.  I was in no mood to articulate sentences but somehow just putting down the root of what I felt seemed do-able.  I wrote this:

FEAR

Ugly binding

Stressing worrying over-thinking

Is not from G0d

Bondage

And I drew chains around my poem.  (Those are easy to draw!) I didn't like leaving something so dark so thought I'd look at the opposite:

TRUST

Restful holy

Refreshing peaceful loving

I'm free in You!

SAFE

And I drew a daisy chain around that. :-)  (Mine wasn't quite as good as this picture, though!)

Somehow slowing down and doing this simple exercise relaxed me and focused my mind and heart so I could actually deal with how I was feeling with a lot less struggle to get to that point than usual.  I had a great talk with my Father and left the room after only about 15 minutes feeling peaceful and trusting.

So while I'll never be artistic in that way, I'm leaving a box of art pencils by my journal in the nightstand---and we'll see what happens!

Worldwide......

It's been an interesting day of being confronted by something 'normal' to me where we've been living the past few years in a different context.  Well, I don't think the exploitation of women is 'normal,' but it's something I've grown accustomed to--but not comfortable with--being around.

Today I've been horrified by a terrible Facebook hack of someone I know who is not in a first world nation. I don't think she has a computer at home so it will probably be some days before she discovers the horrible pornographic photos put up on her wall and even as her cover photo on her page.  She probably used an internet cafe computer and left her page open.  She'll be absolutely mortified and feel victimized when she discovers what's happened.

But what about the girls in the photos to start with?  No woman suddenly just wakes up one day and decides to take her clothes off for a camera.  They're victims, too........

Aaron's here for his mid-term break (and medical appointments).  The boys have been wanting to go to an army surplus store to browse so we took them to one in Auckland today.  Prostitution is legal in New Zealand and it turns out that the store was on a street with a lot of brothels on it.  There was nothing going on on the street, unlike our usual neighborhood, but it was disturbing to see the signs and blatant advertisement of what goes on behind the closed doors.

We were at a function a while back where I sat by a lady who had worked as a social worker who checked up on the well being of women in the trade in Auckland.  She obviously thought it was well within the girls' 'rights' to sell themselves, but when I asked her opinion of how they got there to start with she replied, "Well, obviously there's a strong connection between past abuse and women who chose the lifestyle."  Huh?  But it's OK????

I think not.

It's a big, bad, fallen world..........everywhere.